I`m hearing

  • davetheflower
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569139
Sealegs wrote: As somebody that has to fly every single week, I can tell you that this is a "cultural thing".

To date I have never seen a non white getting "so agitated" by a crying/misbehaved child.

Such a situation is as often as stressful for the parents as those around.

I believe that if somebody gets that pissed off, particularly on a short flight, it usually is because they are grumpy farts in general.

Tolerance is a great virtue, although not all cultures would seem to feel the same way.

God knows what the reaction would be if someone would have posted " non black"
Your basically calling the whitey a non tolerant grumpy fart..
You must know my father in law.

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  • easy
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569282
I hope he reads this....

1stly i would like to say that there are far many people out there with kids in serious conditions and ailments that make me not want to respond but i will.

My son is now 4 years old, he has been diagnosed with SEVERE ADHD (trust me its not made up) we have spent over £7k in various tests and situations to make sure its the real thing.

Up until 6 months ago as a family we were at the end of our tether, flights were a nightmare , restaurants a no no. On a return flight from LAX we had 3 people in our Virgin Upper Class cabin asking to be moved to "anywhere else"

The thing is we never knew, we thought he was just "in a phase" but with the help of the school and psychiatrists and phycologists we eventually had the tough decision to make. Medicate or not, the NHS won't medicate a child under 6, so we went private and 6 months ago our son was REBORN.

Sometimes guys even what appears to be a "normal" situation is far from normal and anyone that behaves like apparently this guy behaved is a plank.


BTW, my son pays near the same price when we fly near the front of the plane.......and is probably not as rowdy as a drunk......

but that is another story. some compassion and understanding is in order.
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  • johnnycomelately
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569288
Well done easy,without having to go into it,i can relate to your story, and know the pain
Callous people just don't give a damn,but cower when ill fortune hit them.[not that i wish anybody any misfotune]

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  • easy
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569289
Johnny,


with us it was / is not even pain. Its was just shear frustration and not knowing "what was wrong" , i can tell you we left restaurants well into double digits without finishing our meals. He was impossible , the saddest thing is for him he "missed" out on years 2-3 as his brain was so fucked up only now is he showing certain emotions and attachments.

We are blessed though with a super smart boy (they testing him for autism) and a very very nice kid (not because he is mine) but the ailment he had (untreated) made him impossible and made us appear (and sometimes feel) as inadequate or useless parents.

Next year i start my work with other families in our area with this issue. There is not enough being done by the NHS to help families and unless you go private your child ends up excluded from school and other social events.
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  • ruffian
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569299
easy wrote: Johnny,


with us it was / is not even pain. Its was just shear frustration and not knowing "what was wrong" , i can tell you we left restaurants well into double digits without finishing our meals. He was impossible , the saddest thing is for him he "missed" out on years 2-3 as his brain was so fucked up only now is he showing certain emotions and attachments.

We are blessed though with a super smart boy (they testing him for autism) and a very very nice kid (not because he is mine) but the ailment he had (untreated) made him impossible and made us appear (and sometimes feel) as inadequate or useless parents.

Next year i start my work with other families in our area with this issue. There is not enough being done by the NHS to help families and unless you go private your child ends up excluded from school and other social events.

No need to type my story - thats it. Exactly the same scenario with my son. Nothing worse than struggling blindly to ease the frustration and emotional turmoil of someone you love.

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  • rob faux
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569366
easy wrote: I hope he reads this....

1stly i would like to say that there are far many people out there with kids in serious conditions and ailments that make me not want to respond but i will.

My son is now 4 years old, he has been diagnosed with SEVERE ADHD (trust me its not made up) we have spent over £7k in various tests and situations to make sure its the real thing.

Up until 6 months ago as a family we were at the end of our tether, flights were a nightmare , restaurants a no no. On a return flight from LAX we had 3 people in our Virgin Upper Class cabin asking to be moved to "anywhere else"

The thing is we never knew, we thought he was just "in a phase" but with the help of the school and psychiatrists and phycologists we eventually had the tough decision to make. Medicate or not, the NHS won't medicate a child under 6, so we went private and 6 months ago our son was REBORN.

Sometimes guys even what appears to be a "normal" situation is far from normal and anyone that behaves like apparently this guy behaved is a plank.


BTW, my son pays near the same price when we fly near the front of the plane.......and is probably not as rowdy as a drunk......

but that is another story. some compassion and understanding is in order.

As I pointed out, I already got that T-Shirt.....................for me the point is not how difficult a problem our child is ,but how considerate we are and how much we expect the rest of humanity to bear our cross!
In these type of situations ,I do not judge the child,but rather the parent/s attitude....................some seem to expect me to find their child's ,sometimes purely naughty behaviour, as cute as they do!

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  • elmer
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569391
There is one thing that I am not able to understand and I offer no criticism or solution.
Being a very old person and knowing that as a child I did many naughty things I cannot remember so many children having these documented illnesses.
I know they exist.
Are these ill children due to the change in diet ,lifestyle etc?

I do know I was never naughty when my father was around!
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  • TNaicker
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569396
It's likely all the nonsense in our foods...preservatives, chemicals that increase growth rate of fruits and vegetables, etc, etc...

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  • rob faux
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569402
elmer wrote: There is one thing that I am not able to understand and I offer no criticism or solution.
Being a very old person and knowing that as a child I did many naughty things I cannot remember so many children having these documented illnesses.
I know they exist.
Are these ill children due to the change in diet ,lifestyle etc?

I do know I was never naughty when my father was around!

Elmer ,I must be your age as I have often asked the same things .......................I think in our day, a spanking effectively cured most of children's minor syndromes..........lol.

The only thing I will add is that,sadly ,in my Fathers mind,there were only behaved and badly behaved children,WITHOUT EXCEPTION, so in the case of his grandson's genuinely diagnosed mental issues ,my old man couldn't adjust that thinking!

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  • easy
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago - 9 years 10 months ago
#569429
Rob

sometimes we smiling because we are so stressed and nervous that all we can do is smile. Sometimes after not sleeping for days and dealing with screaming a smile is all we have left.

as for "naughty" what defines naughty? sometimes you think my son is naughty but he is just so frustrated that his only outlet is shouting or screaming. My son has a pure heart , he has no malice, but he can't help himself , his brain does NOT process danger and his BRAIN cannot handle change. So with him its ALL about routine, and as soon as we change that routine he tilts. The fact that his ADHD is so severe means that his autism has not been fully tested or diagnosed yet, what we have no doubt about is that a lot of his frustrations come from being so bright and not being able to get his brain to get the words out as quick as he needs to. This makes him stutter and get very anxious.

Im not defending him (this does not need defending) I'm simply stating the fact that sometimes on that plane or train or restaurant there is more going on than meets the eye...

Now lets talk about punishment, my boy has had everything except waterboarding done. It has no effect because his brain cannot associate the 2 , even now under medication (his is better) if something does not interest him he does not pay attention.

What interests him he excels in, so he counts up and down to 60, he knows every car make on the road, he can tell you how many people are in a room just by walking in and glancing up (no counting with fingers) BUT when we get to shopping mall we have to ask him which door he is getting out of. The doors change with his mind changing, its a small battle we let him win. We don't want to fight him over the choice of a door (we used to before we understood him) but we do fight him on him choosing ONLY hot scalding water for the bath....and we explain why.

Hidings don't work for him, he feels no pain. Taking toys and iPads away meant nothing until about 3 months ago when after 3 months on medication he started to become "normal"

School is an issue, he used to trip a kid up. The 1 hour later when that same kid fell he was there first to pick him up and console him/her....

Gents, this is a brain wiring condition. It splits many families and even though in the old days methods were applied that YOU might think worked, i disagree. BTW i FOUGHT this diagnosis when it was delivered BUT i see the benefits of the medication coupled with the assistance at school.ALSO our dealing with him has changed, we don't shout anymore and we stopped punishing him. We talk softly to him and drop down to his level. we allow certain things to get away with and mostly we have grown to love him even more......and started liking him

So say what you want, sometimes that kid on the flight is just a little special and the parents are at the end of their tether and all they have left is a smile....

My friend Solotrama has been on the journey with me (over the phone) and he can tell you how its been BUT its now 10000000% better
Last edit: 9 years 10 months ago by easy.

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  • LSU
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569466
Having read all the threads the one thing that stands out for me is that it is clearly sometimes best not to have an opinion on everything.

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  • mikesack
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Re: I`m hearing

9 years 10 months ago
#569468
elmer wrote: There is one thing that I am not able to understand and I offer no criticism or solution.
Being a very old person and knowing that as a child I did many naughty things I cannot remember so many children having these documented illnesses.
I know they exist.
Are these ill children due to the change in diet ,lifestyle etc?

I do know I was never naughty when my father was around!


@ elmer

There is a consensus that vaccines are the cause of autism in today's kids. Google vaccines and flu vaccines etc. and you will find this is a widespread occurrence with various websites and facebook pages on this sad state of affairs.

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